Lyrics online

Why is marijuana not legal? Why is marijuana not legal? It's a natural
plant that grows in the dirt. You know what's not natural? Eighty year
old dudes with hard ons. That's not natural, but we've got pills for that.
We're dedicating all our medical resources to keeping the old guys
erect but we're putting people in jail for smoking something that grows
in the dirt?
You know, we have more prescription drugs now than ever. Every
commercial on TV is a prescription drug ad. I can't watch TV for four
minutes without thinking i have five serious diseases. Like, "Do you
ever wake up tired in the mornings?" Oh my god, I have this, write
this down! Whatever this is, I have this! Half the time you don't even
know what the commercial is, there's people running through fields,
or flying kites, or swimming in the ocean. Like, that is the greatest
disease ever! How do you get that? That disease comes with a hot
chick and a puppy!
The schools now, it's all about self-esteem in the schools. Build the
kids' self-esteem, make them feel good about themselves. If
everybody grows up with high self esteem, who's gonna dance in our
strip clubs? What's gonna happen to our porno industry? These women
don't just grow on trees, it takes lots of drunk daddies missing a lot of
dance recitals before you decide to blow a goat on the internet for fifty
bucks. And if that disappears, where does that leave me on a Friday
with my new high speed connection?
Sing sing sing... Sing your song... Sing for me... (Come on now, sing)
Sing sing sing... Sing your song... Sing for me... (Sing sing sing...)
Mastermind's not a word that comes up all the time, you keep hearing
about these, ah, these terrorist masterminds that are being killed over
in the middle-east. Terrorist masterminds! Mastermind is sort of a lofty
way to describe what these guys do, don't you think? They'